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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

I'm Un-Fine, How Are You?

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I’m feeling so stationary right now, like a jellyfish in a spot with no current.  I can see places I would like to be, but don’t know how to get there.  There are so many places to choose from – directions to aim, but I’m not drawn anywhere in particular.  That seems to contradict the first statement, but it doesn’t really.  The want is more of an idle curiosity than a deep desire within my core.

Coreless – maybe that’s how I’m feeling.  There is a sense of shallowness in all that I am doing.  It’s like that time when you try to nap and find rest, but you can’t sleep. Or you try to stay awake and read or watch a movie only to find yourself drifting off.  That place is where I’m living right now.

I’m unfocused and uninterested and uninteresting!

Blah!

I know there is more.

I want to want the more, but I just don’t.

Maybe tomorrow I will.  Tomorrow is a new day, and this one isn’t done yet.  The tide may turn.  I wasn’t like this yesterday.  So today, I’m going to listen to Lisa-Jo and just say that I am un-fine.  You know what? It’s fine with me to let you know that.

Are you un-fine, too?

10 comments:

  1. Aww Amy my winter season has been just that, I know I wanted more a longing to do more but still no clear vision of what that looks like, prayers for you and hugs of course:)

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    1. Thanks so much. Winter can be tough, but this was a little different. Praying that you receive clarity and peace in your journey.

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  2. I'm super un-fine today too. Just drifting along. I know I need to wait for tomorrow and start over, but today feels hard. I feel like one of those race horses before the starting gate, all discombobulated and tense, ready to run but with no where to go. I feel ya sista. I feel ya.

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    1. Discombobulated is such a good word - it even sounds like what it means. Hope you have dropped the "un" and are off through the starting gate.

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  3. There's a bit of freedom in this --> I'm unfine - when we speak outloud allow ourselves to feel it maybe then we can release it to God... Thank you Amy for honesty here.

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    1. You are welcome. There is freedom always in truth. We can't be afraid to ask for it, give it , or receive it.

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  4. Oh, friend, I had such an unfine moment this morning... so bad I don't know if I will ever be able to share it! But God is good... and kids are forgiving! :) Thanks for sharing your unfine!

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    1. I've had many, many of those unfine moments that leap right out of me from my past generations. I'm not sure everything has to be shared in all its gory details. Thank God that we are given forgiveness and can extend it to each other. {{hugs}} to you friend for being brave enough to even mention it.

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  5. I was so absolutely UN-Fine yesterday, too! Praise God His mercies are new every morning. Keep on keeping on and I think that as we press more and more into Him, we keep finding our way, one day at a time.
    sheila

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    1. Absolutely!! Thank you for your kind encouragement.

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